Strength

While being strong is often viewed as a great gift, it can also be a source of downfall. I have spent my life having to be the strong one, or at least thinking that I had to be. From childhood, when I believed I had to be the strong one and hold the family together, until now, where I am not only the strong one for others, but for myself as well.

The thing is – when you are strong – people notice. They admire and respect your ability to handle whatever obstacles life places in your path. They attempt to emulate your composure and resilience. However, they also assume that you are like a superhero and somehow handle everything. You know the truth. There are some things that are beyond even you. At the end of the day, you are still a mere mortal and there are things in which you wish you could be supported from outside of yourself. But when you are the strong one all the time, you lack the ability to know how to ask for what you need or fear appearing week. Regardless, alone, you trudge your hills and fight your battles.

Just because you are strong and capable and have learned to be self reliant, doesn’t mean that you don’t need consoling. Just because you aren’t needy doesn’t mean that you don’t want a shoulder to cry on when the levees of your soul finally give. You too have pains of your past that resurface and burdens that bear on your heart. You too would rather conquer the beast rather than build up the walls that you have used to protect yourself in the past.

True strength can only exist when you have enough to give. Having enough to give requires the vulnerability of trusting another to lend you the support you need when you need it. So hold on to your strength, but not so tightly that you squeeze out your ability to ask for help or that you do not give yourself permission to be helped when the weight of the world is beyond you.